When I first read these “tricky questions” that NOM campaigners have to “deal” with on a daily basis I couldn’t help but be a little agitated. So after a glass of wine and a grilled chicken salad later I decided to share my opinions…
1. Are you a bigot? “Why do you want to take away people’s rights?”
“Isn’t it wrong to write discrimination into the constitution?”
A: “Do you really believe people like me who believe mothers and fathers both matter to kids are like bigots and racists? I think that’s pretty offensive, don’t you? Particularly to the 60 percent of African-Americans who oppose same-sex marriage. Marriage as the union of husband and wife isn’t new; it’s not taking away anyone’s rights. It’s common sense.”
MY ANSWER: Shall we let the oxford dictionary answer that one… Bigot, origin of the word: late 16th century (denoting a superstitious religious hypocrite): from French.
2. Isn’t the ban on gay marriage like bans on interracial marriage?
A: “Bans on interracial marriage were about keeping two races apart so that one race could oppress the other. Marriage is about bringing two sexes together, so that children get the love of their own mom and a dad, and women don’t get stuck with the enormous disadvantages of parenting alone.” “Having a parent of two different races is just not the same as being deprived of your mother—or your father.”
MY ANSWER: Banning same sex marriage may not intentionally oppress the LGBT community, but it does exactly that. We are not able to achieve the legal or financial securities of marriage that heterosexual couples take for granted.
3. Why do we need a constitutional amendment? “Isn’t DOMA enough?”
A: “Lawsuits like the one that imposed gay marriage in Massachusetts now threaten marriage in at least 12 other states so far. We need a marriage amendment to settle the issue once and for all, so we don’t have this debate in our face every day. The people get to decide what marriage means. No-end run around the rules by activist judges or grandstanding San-Francisco-style politicians.”
MY ANSWER: You will have this debate in your face every day until you and I are equal.
4. What’s the harm from SSM? “How can Adam and Steve hurt your marriage?”
A: “Who gets harmed? The people of this state who lose our right to define marriage as the union of husband and wife, that’s who. That is just not right.”
A: “If courts rule that same-sex marriage is a civil right, then, people like you and me who believe children need moms and dads will be treated like bigots and racists.”
“Religious groups like Catholic Charities or the Salvation Army may lose their tax exemptions, or be denied the use of parks and other public facilities, unless they endorse gay marriage."
“Public schools will teach young children that two men being intimate are just the same as a husband and wife, even when it comes to raising kids.”
MY ANSWER: Scare mongering, by suggesting that “public schools will teach YOUNG CHILDREN that TWO MEN BEING INTIMATE are just the same as husband and wife” just confirms your inability to compromise and pushes you further into the stigma of being a BIGOT.
“When the idea that children need moms and dads get legally stigmatized as bigotry, the job of parents and faith communities trying to transmit a marriage culture to their kids is going to get a lot harder.”
“One thing is for sure: The people of this state will lose our right to keep marriage as the union of a husband and wife. That’s not right.”
MY ANSWER: Oh no! Not YOUR right to go around telling all your friends that marriage is the union of husband and wife…How dare we!?!? I had no idea we were ruining your lives, relationships and futures in such a wicked, cruel, selfish way :-o !
5. Why do you want to interfere with love?
A: “Love is a great thing. But marriage isn’t just any kind of love; it’s the special love of husband and wife for each other and their children.”
MY ANSWER: “Love is a great thing,” now there is something we agree on but I don’t think that the type of love I share with my fiancée differs from the love you share with yours, regardless of our genitalia.
6. What about benefits? Don’t gay couples and their kids need the benefits and protections of marriage?”
A: “If medical proxies aren’t working, let’s fix that problem. If people need health care, let’s get them health care. Don’t mess with marriage.”
A: “The issue isn’t benefits, it is marriage. Local folks can decide benefits. This is about the meaning of marriage, our most basic social institution for protecting children. “
MY ANSWER: Now let us look again at your answer for questions five…remember that part where you said: “marriage isn’t just any kind of love; it’s the special love of husband and wife for each other and their children”. So why can two men or two women not indulge in marriage “our most basic social institution for protecting children”.
7. Isn’t divorce the real threat to marriage?
A: “High rates of divorce are one more reason we should be strengthening marriage, not conducting radical social experiments on it.”
MY ANSWER: Allowing more people a chance to genuinely enter into the life long bond of marriage will surely strengthen marriage
8. Are you saying gays cannot be good parents?
A: “Two men might each be a good father, but neither can be a mom. The ideal for children is the love of their own mom and dad. No same-sex couple can provide that.”
MY ANSWER: The statement that “the ideal for children is the love of their own mom and dad” is irrelevant in practice are you saying that adopted and fostered children and children being raised in one parent households are inadequately loved and cared for?
9. What about older or infertile couples? If they marry why not same-sex couples?
A: “Every man and woman who marries is capable of giving any child they create (or adopt) a mother and a father. No same-sex couple can do this. It’s apples and oranges.”
MY ANSWER: So you would rather older couples bring babies into the world they cannot care or provide for and if you can compromise in the case of adoption…why not in the case of gay marriage.
Well that’s just my opinion on the matter…
The answers in white can be found on the National Organization for Marriage Website along with some other disturbing gibberish. THIS is who we are fighting!
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